Just like a lady

September 18, 2005

It's all about clean underwear and a decent clutch bag, says Tara Palmer-Tomkinson

Take Prince Charles’s wedding. I think I lived up to the occasion — I wore a Prada dress and stole and a Philip Treacy hat, all in nude tones, with a beautiful little pair of wrist gloves. It was elegant and impish. Very ladylike. And very me.

Dressing like a lady starts with the underwear. Whatever else happens, you’ve got to know you’ve got it going on underneath. After that, it’s about simplicity, about not making a statement.

Clothes need to fit in the right places (Sienna Miller isn’t ladylike — hippie chic is never going to be elegant). Rule number one is: in at the waist, out at the bum. A tailored jacket will do it, or a neat little suit, or perhaps a little black dress under a short white trench.

There’s a thin line between ladylike and footballer’s wife, and it’s easy to get it wrong. Footballers’ wives use too much fake tan and wear too much bling. If you’re wearing a short, flirty kilt by Vivienne Westwood, team it with a more demure top. Don’t have it all on show.

Not that clothes matter quite so much if you have the right accessories to go with them. Take Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s: that huge hat with the ribbon and the little black dress with the pearls. Classic and elegant. Or Sarah Jessica Parker in Sex and the City, particularly the scenes in Paris — shift dress, trench coat, great sunglasses, killer heels and a little clutch bag. So chic.

Get the accessories right and you’ve cracked it. Philip Treacy’s python-skin clutch bag does it for me: python is so snaky, so now. And his brilliant little wrist gloves are divine. Don’t even think about wearing long elbow gloves. I’m sure Natasha Kaplinsky is a nice girl, but God, wearing those gopping great gloves on Strictly Come Dancing was a hideous mistake. Particularly with a pink dress.

Personally, I don’t do scarves. I’m more of a stole girl. There’s nothing like a bit of fur or cashmere to posh up your outfit. I would, however, make an exception for a Pucci neckscarf worn with a natty pair of shades.

Shoes must be clean and well heeled, and should always have an affinity with your bag — even if it’s just a tiny clutch that matches a pair of Manolos (careful, though, too matchy-matchy is nauseating). And that bag and shoe set from Debenhams isn’t going to work. If you have to, buy a simple dress and blow the rest of the budget on the accessories. Being ladylike never comes cheap.

There are, of course, times when it’s inappropriate to dress like a lady: Glastonbury, the V Festival, the bedroom. But there are times when you just have to. And this season is one of them.